System Racism and Domestic Abuse

As I've been trying to figure out systemic racism in the United States, I've begun to notice commonalities with domestic abuse. Both involve one party attaining power by taking power away from the other party, the grooming of both the prey and of peers in order to attain power more smoothly, the destruction of the prey's identity and resources and relationships, and putting the onus of reconciliation on the prey rather than on the predator. Although I've been working on this idea for months now, I haven't been certain enough of the parallels to put words to it.

What I've been hearing more and more often since the presidential election, particularly from people of color, particularly from Black people, is that the silver lining is how undeniable both overt and systemic racism have become. Racism in the United States is much more blatant now. At first I couldn't see how this development could possibly be good or helpful, but I shut my mouth and opened my ears. So many voices that know a lot more than I do have been saying this, there must be something to it.

It finally clicked for me when I realized the statement "at least X doesn't hit you" is no different from "racism ended with the civil rights movement." The most inconspicuous domestic abuse is the most effective domestic abuse - most people just don't know how to help or even believe someone who doesn't have bruises. In the same vein, the most inconspicuous racism (notice that it's most inconspicuous to the people who benefit most from it) has been the most pervasive racism. How often has it been argued "I can't be racist, I have a black friend" as though the perceived tolerance of one person excuses one's behavior? Fr. Bryan Massingale has spoken about the misconception of racism as an overt, clearly stated declaration. This misconception is both a product of and a contributing factor towards the systemic racism upon which the United States has been built.
In the same vein, domestic abuse that is not physically violent is rarely taken seriously in one's community. It's often brushed aside as a misunderstanding, all in the prey's head, or told "they don't really mean it." Spouses and children are usually told to try to please the person, usually someone in a position of authority, in order to mend the bond. This only draws more power to the abuser, who continues to benefit from the abuse. Prey who are unfamiliar with domestic abuse usually don't have words to describe what's happening to them, and can't/won't call it "abuse" simply because it isn't physical. Often only after the prey shows visible signs of physical abuse do schools, CPS, police, communities intercede - this is due partly to low resources, and partly to the easy deniability of abuse that is not physical.

Months ago, I thought I was going crazy for thinking that systemic racism is essentially domestic abuse on a large scale. Now I wonder if these macrocosms and microcosms are symptoms of a larger human problem?