Oh the joys of sex positivity! Who knew therapy could be so much fun?! It's healing, a way to take control of one's 50% of the situation (or some other percentage, depending on how many people are involved). Enthusiastic consent makes the entire experience even more enjoyable.
Today is Milwaukee's SlutWalk and it's so wonderful how many people, particularly Alverno people, who are marching in it. Wish I could be there with you glorious sluts!
After a very strict Catholic upbringing, it was only about midway through college that I learned to accept pleasure. Suffering doesn't actually accomplish anything (it could be argued that one learned through suffering, but extreme Catholicism looks down on learning as much as on pleasure), and enjoying pleasure doesn't make one a bad person. It's ok to be moderately selfish, especially when so much fun can be had giving as well. Sexual pleasure is a physical release, and going at it enthusiastically and partaking in power play bring about a mental/emotional release as well.
Many thanks to Susie Bright, Eve Ensler, Del LaGrace Volcano, Annie Sparkle, Margaret Cho and many many others who have brought about the queer sex-positive awareness that has certainly improved my life and, well, certainly the lives of my lovers! There are indeed queer slut role models aplenty, advocates of enthusiastic consent and body awareness and gender fluidity, which can flood one's life like a rainbow avalanche if only that door is opened. They've cleared the rough paths so that mine may be easier to walk (or skip).
And a very special thank you to Kate Bornstein. The quote in her book Gender Outlaw has made all the difference: "never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be." (and, of course, my appreciation to the grandmother who coined the phrase, and to the anonymous person who announced it at a Bornstein event).
Showing posts with label SlutWalk. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SlutWalk. Show all posts
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Thursday, June 16, 2011
SlutWalk Season
I always love Pride Month, but this June is turning out more active and exciting than any beforehand. In addition to travels galore (to get away from the Midwestern winter's grip), Chicago's SlutWalk and Milwaukee's PrideFest were just a week apart! Both events serve as a statement of sexual freedom, from activities to identities. Both involve pride, networking, diversified unity, and a good serving of comedy. And there are those who choose to withdraw from both events, either because it's just not their cup of tea or from policy disagreements. And that's fine!
At Chicago's SlutWalk, I got a t-shirt advertising the event and its date. I wore it to Milwaukee's PrideFest, naturally. At least a dozen people, ranging from sassy queens to rough bulldykes and everyone in between, commented on it and asked me about it. All of them said that, had they known it was going on, they would have come down to march. I told them all the same: Google Milwaukee's SlutWalk and march in that one. Later, I discovered that the booth of ToolShed, Milwaukee's queer sex shop, had information on their city's upcoming SlutWalk. August 13!
You can see at http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/satellite where and when worldwide SlutWalks are taking place. Or you can just search online your location and "SlutWalk."
The fact that this kind of event, marching out against sexual assault and oppression, is internationally popular implies that people are ready for change. It's arguable what a few hours of marching can accomplish, true. But the eagerness to make a public statement, in the streets, across cultures and nations is suggestive of perhaps greater changes. This has coincided with the DSK scandal, for example, which many consider to be the international Anita Hill/Clarence Thomas. That scandal has brought to European cultures what Anita Hill arose in America nearly 20 years ago. Could it be that all these people around the world are sick of the silence around sexual harassment? Are people finally coming around to the idea that appearances are not invitations? Pride has loosened the connection between sexual preference and personal quality, and maybe now that concept is extending beyond the LGBTQ community.
At Chicago's SlutWalk, I got a t-shirt advertising the event and its date. I wore it to Milwaukee's PrideFest, naturally. At least a dozen people, ranging from sassy queens to rough bulldykes and everyone in between, commented on it and asked me about it. All of them said that, had they known it was going on, they would have come down to march. I told them all the same: Google Milwaukee's SlutWalk and march in that one. Later, I discovered that the booth of ToolShed, Milwaukee's queer sex shop, had information on their city's upcoming SlutWalk. August 13!
You can see at http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/satellite where and when worldwide SlutWalks are taking place. Or you can just search online your location and "SlutWalk."
The fact that this kind of event, marching out against sexual assault and oppression, is internationally popular implies that people are ready for change. It's arguable what a few hours of marching can accomplish, true. But the eagerness to make a public statement, in the streets, across cultures and nations is suggestive of perhaps greater changes. This has coincided with the DSK scandal, for example, which many consider to be the international Anita Hill/Clarence Thomas. That scandal has brought to European cultures what Anita Hill arose in America nearly 20 years ago. Could it be that all these people around the world are sick of the silence around sexual harassment? Are people finally coming around to the idea that appearances are not invitations? Pride has loosened the connection between sexual preference and personal quality, and maybe now that concept is extending beyond the LGBTQ community.
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