Thursday, October 4, 2012


In 11 days I'll turn 27.  Despite certain bullshit, the mid 20's aren't that bad.  Right after college, everything was awkward and terrible.  College drops you right on your ass and you're supposed to be an adult now but you have no money and you don't know what you're doing without some kind of set framework - it sucks.  Then things calm down and you can party and figure out what your actual options are.

When I was a kid, I was led to believe that I'd marry before 20, preferably at 16.  Once I reached 14 and 15 and not only had no suitors come along, but also my peers told me that I was so ugly that the only way anyone would have sex with me was through rape (they didn't know that this was actually happening at the time).  I was distraught, thinking that I was unlovable and had failed my authorities by not fulfilling their mandates.

Once I figured out that marrying by 16 is usually a horrible idea and that my education came first, I set my goal to 28 for both marriage and parenthood.  My mother was heartbroken.  I'd find a monogamous partner, we'd have fun and explore the world, we'd gradually intertwine our lives codependently, then we'd marry and have kids.  After a few attempts at this, it finally dawned on me that monogamy is not for me and codependency nauseates me.  Marriage and parenthood hold no appeal.

Although I shed all age-related goals and my personal wants have changed dramatically - they may again, who knows - that marker of 28 still holds significance.  It was an arbitrary choice: I watched Friends and thought it was what normal young adult life was like and they were all around 28, right?  Nevertheless, onwards to another year of adventure!

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